Say You Won't Let Go
by IwannabeaStarshipRanger21
Summary: Ben/Rey one-shot set during TROS. Don't read if you haven't watched Episode IX. Contains smut.


Her

Lips

Were

On

Mine. And I thought I might die right there.

When we broke apart it was too soon, but all I could do was grin like an absolute fool.

Her smile mirrored mine and it was like my whole body breathed a heavy sigh of relief; this was real. She was real, and she wanted this as much as I did. And then I was pulling her back into me, my lips crashing to hers more fiercely than before. I wanted to drown in this moment; I simply could not get enough. Somehow I'd done it, she was alive. She was here, and alive, and it was more than I thought possible.

Alive.

Alive.

Alive.

And she was soft. She was so soft, and her hands were threading their way through my hair; tugging as she went, driving me absolutely mad. My face was still wet with tears, and it had made her lips salty, but I found I didn't care.

If I'd thought touching her hand had been something unearthly, then this was beyond the borders of my imagination. I could feel my skin practically _humming, _the bond connecting us responding - as if this was what it had been waiting for all along, as if it were a physical being capable of such a thing.

She shifted into my lap then; and the world tilted on its axis.

The only thing I could hear coming from her mind that made any coherent sense was my name, just my name, over and over and over.

_Ben._

_Ben. _

_Ben._

I feared my breath would be permanently stolen; my heart in my throat.

Her warm fingers had started to drift up my abdomen, and then she was almost desperately trying to tug the hem of my shirt up. I needed no further encouragement, wishing to feel more of her soft skin on mine. How many times had I dreamt of it, her skin on mine? Surely too many to contemplate.

She began to shed her own clothing, and I could feel the tips of my ears grow warm. I hadn't ever...but I had never imagined I was even _capable_ of feeling the way I felt about her.

I had thought the mere concept of love – of loving someone, of someone loving _me_, forever lost. I had done too much; I had destroyed; ruined.

But _I loved her. _So much it made my chest ache.

Her skin was everywhere, and I was kissing up the smooth expanse of her neck. When my teeth grazed a small spot behind her ear she whimpered, and brought her mouth roughly back to mine. The sound did things to me, and I suddenly felt my pants were _much_ too constricting.

"Mmmm." She moaned, nodding, her fingers reaching for my belt.

Oh.

"Your thoughts are loud." She smiled against my mouth.

It, of course, made perfect sense that she could hear my thoughts just as clearly as I could hers, but I marvelled at her nonetheless, stroking her hair back from her face.

I swallowed. "Rey, I…"

"I know." She interrupted, kissing me again. _I love you too._

My heart was overwhelmed with emotion. Not only with the knowledge that Rey – _Rey_ – loved _me_, but also over how much time I'd wasted in not kissing her, in not loving her this way. I resolved to never take it for granted again.

As the last of our clothes were discarded I found I was no longer nervous; this was _Rey._ And she was touching me, kissing me, wanted to be with me. It was more than I could comprehend, but it was happening.

I lay her back then, my lips trailing down her ribcage. I found that her skin was littered with little freckles, and I was busy worshipping them, lower and lower, when her voice came: "Ben?" She said, a little unsure.

I looked up at her, rubbing my thumb reassuringly over her stomach. I flashed an image of _exactly_ what I wanted to do to her through the bond, and her breath audibly caught. "Oh." She breathed.

I could _feel_ her nervousness just as strongly as if it were my own. But she nodded nonetheless, curiosity winning out.

I knew she was just as inexperienced as I was; but I couldn't shake the want to kiss her _there_ – to make her feel good, as I'd heard it would.

She let out a little gasp when I finally did just that, and although I had no idea what I was doing, it was not difficult to catch on given her reactions. Not to mention I could literally feel everything she was feeling now, which was not something that had ever happened before, nor something I wished to examine too closely right at that particular moment.

Her breaths were heavy, and she took her lower lip in between her teeth as I added a finger, and not long after, a second, to the ministrations of my tongue.

When she came undone, she clutched at my hair almost painfully, but kriff if it was not the sexiest thing I'd ever seen.

She pulled me back up to her quickly, capturing my lips in another searing kiss. She trembled slightly, her breath hot on my face, and then she was touching me – and my heart dropped into my stomach. My head slumped into the valley of her breasts, taking a hardened nipple in my mouth, eliciting a moan. Her thumb swiped over the tip of me and I swore into her skin. If she kept doing that I knew I wouldn't last. But she must have gotten that through the bond, too, as she began to guide to me to her.

I looked at her then, kissing the corner of her mouth. "You sure?" I said, my eyes searching hers for any doubt this was too much, too soon, that she didn't want this.

"I've never been more sure of anything in my life." She said, smiling up at me. My heart swelled.

When we connected, it was the most intense experience of my life. She was so warm and wet and _tight._ I cursed again, moving slowly so she could get used the feeling. I could feel what this was for her too, just as clearly – stretched and somehow more _whole_ than ever. Tears glistened her cheeks and I bent to kiss them away. It wasn't from any pain, though there was some of that too – all I could feel was her inexplicable, overwhelming joy.

An image flashed through our bond then – of this, just us like this – solid and clear. I looked at her, startled, as she brushed her fingers across my face. It was then that I realised that this is what she had seen, that day our fingertips had brushed – galaxies apart – she was showing me what she had seen.

I kissed her like a man possessed, and she began to move beneath me. A strangled moan escaped my lips.

She was everywhere. She was everything.

When she flipped us over and started moving atop me it was my undoing, and she moved quickly to capture my lips in hers as a string of curses, and her name, escaped my mouth.

When it was over she moved to roll off me, but I pulled her body back into mine fiercely, wrapping my arms around her lithe form. She snuggled against me.

I breathed in the scent of her hair; kissed her forehead.

I felt so light. The happiest I had in years.

I didn't know what tomorrow would bring, but I was certain that whatever it was, I could whether anything with her by my side. And she seemed to silently agree, taking my hand in hers.


End file.
